Lost in the Continent of Incontinence: maximum protection for those fits of laughter

I long ago decided that I come from a family of camels – able to consume large quantities of water and rarely need to find a restroom while out and about... So when I received a tearful call from mum asking for help shopping for incontinence products, I was saddened by this newest difficulty –bounding out of bed in the middle of the night with arthritis is just not possible, and it took an ‘accident’ for my mum to finally admit defeat. Off we went to the store, and what started off as a sombre excursion quickly turned into a laugh fest as we experienced yet another role reversal.

I quickly located the right section, just down from the myriad of feminine hygiene products, and called out to my mother at the other end. I don’t think I’ve seen my mum move so fast, as she made a beeline towards me with a scowl and a stern reprimand for calling attention to ourselves, and specifically to her ‘issue’. All of a sudden, I had a picture of the two of us standing in a similar aisle some 30 odd years ago, her pointing to all the feminine products asking which one I would prefer in what seemed like the loudest voice she could possibly muster as I silently died of embarrassment. Tears of laughter started to roll down my face, as my mum stood there looking quite indignant; she didn’t remember our little experience quite as vividly as me. But it did help to break the tension.

Little did we know that the Aisle of Incontinence is quickly rivalling the Wall of Menses! Both my mum and I stood there lost in a foreign land of maximum absorbency, trying to figure out which offered the ‘best protection’, laughing at sizing charts and detailed descriptions of leakage. After 20 minutes of studiously pouring over labels, she finally closed her eyes and grabbed a package from the narrowed list...

It turns out that not all incontinence products are created equal – a few days later, my mum dramatically announced that she had an allergic reaction, “akin to a diaper rash” (her words, not mine), which caused her to burst into a fit of giggles… but she had had a wonderful night’s sleep. All’s well that ends with a good chuckle and much needed rest!

We have since discovered that both Depend and Poise offer free samples so you don’t end up increasing the pharmaceutical landfill known as the bathroom cabinet. (Depend: http://www.depend.com/products/get-samples, Poise: http://www.poise.com/samples). I ordered some in, and even though I know it did not sit well with her to have her ‘baby girl’ bring these to her, my mum eventually found her preferred product. Now, not only does she always ensure that she dons clean underwear in case she’s IN an accident, she now has a pad in case OF an accident. And the mother/daughter bonding continues with an added extra absorbent layer (or two).

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Have you had a similar adventure? Share your thoughts in the Comments section below.

 

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